I’m not gonna lie, today started out on the scale of awesomeness somewhere near stepping on a Lego. I didn’t want to get out of bed. I am totally a morning person, but for me, morning isn’t morning until the sun is literally up and creating some sort of natural light. I mean, I will take overcast, stormy even, but the notion that a day starts before it is actually daylight, is, for lack of a better word, stupid.
My weekday’s start pretty much the same. I go into my sons room and I wake him up. Never mind that he is 17 and perfectly capable of waking himself. He is a brooding teenager and the quiet moment each morning where I sit on his bed and stroke his hair until he wakes, rolls over and gives me the message that I am no longer needed is literally one of the only moments we share of parent/child intimacy. I wouldn’t trade this time for anything, which is obvious by my complaining about waking before the sun. I trade my comfort for my mommy and me moment with my son.
Pretty much, after that sweet and brief moment, I am on my own until it is time for boot camp. Ahhhhh boot camp. I have a total love/hate relationship with boot camp. Truth be told, I fricken hate it! Loath it entirely. I hate the way I feel when I am doing burpees, I hate the way my boobs look in the mirror when I am forced to do anything that causes them to heave up and down. I hate how my shirt falls over my head when I am bent over in asinine positions. I hate how I get stray hairs on me from God-knows-who that has spent time on the mat before me. I hate that I am weaksauce to the max and it never seems to be easier or more fun.
I love the results, I love the women who I go to boot camp with and I love the instructor though I hate her whistle and her stop watch. hmmmmmm is the good outweighing the bad here?
This morning in particular I didn’t want to go. I started to talk myself out of it, which, to be honest, I do every single morning. I NEVER get up and think YAY! it’s boot camp day. But today, I especially didn’t want to go. I had stuff to do and I wanted to sit with a cup of coffee more than I wanted suck wind. Every day I try to talk myself out of it because there is nothing about it that is fun, but here is what I know about me that gets me going. I don’t want to fail and I know that I am in charge of my success.
I can list a thousand reasons why I hate boot camp. Each of them is actually valid, but if I cave into that validity and allowed myself to stay home and sip coffee, pretty soon I would also allow myself to opt out of other things that are meaningful, but suck.
Need to clean the house? Nahhhh, it makes me sneeze when I dust, I want to watch TV more.
Need to pay the bills on time? Nahhhhh, I hate dealing with money, so I will just make a lunch date instead because I haven’t seen so-and-so in a while and maintaining good relationships is more important.
Need to blog and grow my business? Nahhhhh, no one reads this stuff anyway, I think my heels feel rough and I need a pedicure.
So, I did what I always do, this morning. I took my inwardly complaining diva into the dressing room and I forced her to put on that too-tight sports bra and those leggings that seem to fit a bit better than they did two months ago and I made her go to boot camp. I did the work and I got the hell outta there.
No sooner did I get home, the phone rang and it was a staffer from Huffington Post Live. They were asking me back for another guest spot on Nancy Redd’s show. Standing there in my sweatiness I agreed to be on air in a couple of hours. Some hair and make-up later and I was ready to rock the divorce world. I had a great time in our Google Hang Out and shared my two cents on how to avoid getting married and divorced within a year. It does happen.
In the quiet time between my boot camp butt kick and my sound check for Huff Post Live, it came to me that the part of me that goes to boot camp. That part of me that does stuff I don’t want to do, but do anyway because it is right. That is the same part of me that got me to the place that Huff Post Live wants to hear what I have to say. That part of me that wakes up before the sun and mothers my son, that part of me that forces me to blog, write content and give it away. That part of me that wrote four books in one year. That part of me that faced three divorces and so much more. That part of me that is good, stable, dependable and pretty fricken awesome- That’s something to be proud of.
I know you want more from this life. I know you have it in you to get up and go get yours. It isn’t going to come and plop in your lap. It isn’t going to law of attract it’s way into being. It isn’t going to Publishers Clearinghouse it’s way into your bank account. You have to go get it. Simple choices, made regularly and against your inner preference not to, will create the life you want. If you make the choices, you end up with a life you well deserve.